Don't Tell Mama (Cabaret)

It's interesting for me to choose not to be close with my parents, when all my friends' parents regard me as their child. It's usually the parents of my only-child friends. I have friends who's mothers call me their son and I call them mom. So many of my friends' mothers invite me out to lunch or dinner, or ask me to stop by the house to see them. They're always happy to see me. And yet I can't bring myself to enjoy my own mother's company. It may be that I resent the fact that I have to hide a big part of myself in order to protect her. I hate that. I'd much rather have nothing to do with someone who doesn't love who I am than have to alter who I am to make them feel comfortable. I wonder if I were ballsy enough to just be a big fag around my parents if they'd grow to accept me and continue to love me, or if they'd just kick me out and banish me from the family. I'd be fine with either, but to tell you the truth, I'd kind of prefer the latter.